this precious moment

 sanctuary and transformation begins here

sanctuary and transformation begins here

Golly, where to begin . . .

Technically, I began this transition just over a year ago when I decided to close out my wholesale business and shift my focus to Tending a Handmade Life.  But an even bigger shift is currently in the works ... I guess things really kicked into high gear with the approach of Hurricane Irma.

I was paying way too much attention to the news and gloom and doom scenarios, glued to the weather apps on my phone and the weather channel.  I was being sucked down by an overwhelming fear.  While we faired just fine after Irma, that grip of fear held on.  

Soon thereafter there was the eye doctor appointments ... routine for anyone used to going to doctors and engaging with humans on a daily basis, but not for this little hermit.  I found myself at a retina specialist in a cramped waiting area surrounded by unruly kids and grumpy people playing loud games on their phones.  By the time I got into the doctor's office, my blood pressure was elevated (I never have high blood pressure) and the doctor wanted me to monitor it.  

After that dreadful appointment (btw, everything with my eyes was fine), the underlying fear continued to hold on.  Off and on throughout the days and into the nights my heart would start to pump wildly, feeling like it was going to beat out of my chest ... not really a panic attack, but I didn't know what the hell was happening.

So I made an appointment with a regular doctor to get checked out ... EKG, blood work, pulse all okay, although my blood pressure was still a wee bit elevated.  Diagnosis ... anxiety ... well ain't that just peachy!

The heart pounding was annoying and not getting any better, if anything, it was getting worse.  I realized it was time to call in the heavy artillery and get to the bottom of whatever was going on ... enter my treasured friend, energy worker and Modern Day Medicine Woman, Marilyn Edwards.  I made an appointment straight away and that's when things really began to change ...

I now believe my symptoms were a wakeup call from spirit ... time to get to work and stop dinking around!  Marilyn and I have been working together regularly over the last couple of months, only taking a break to get past the holidays.  What is becoming clear ... I've spent a lifetime locked into my logical/analytical hard headed ways and have been reluctant to operate from my heart.  There is also a very wounded little girl inside that has spent that lifetime conforming and bowing to the will of others, hiding her powerful gifts.  Amidst these revelations, my heart has ceased its pounding.  Veils are being lifted.  A new life's path is presenting itself.  

For a bit of perspective, I've read through several years of journal entries earnestly yammering on about the same things year after year after year. Make no mistake, there's still a part of me that wants to stay small and tucked securely into my comfort zone and go on yammering.  But that's no longer an option. 

I am deeply committed to digging my way out of all those old synaptic ruts.  I've renewed my meditation and yoga practice.  And my meditations have turned into something of an adventure.  I can feel my energy expanding, my voice and body are active participants ... a new experience ... and long and intense automatic writing sessions are providing spectacular insights and inspiration ... which is where the details for the Ananda Bundles are emerging. 

One thing has become very clear.  I know I am not alone in this journey.  There is a whole tribe of individuals experiencing the same expanding awareness and urges for growth.  I believe part of my new life's path is to be a 'wayshower' ... writing about my journey, creating and sharing tools and talismans as this growing tribe wakes up, becoming a force for light and good.

Through the years, I have shared many beautiful things with a wonderful clientele and will continue to do so.  In the coming months, I hope you will join me as I explore a whole new way of working and creating and sharing my wares, always spirit guided, filled with love and light. 

I am savoring the process and working very diligently to stay present in ... this precious moment.

with deep gratitude ...