It’s not ready ...

Last night I had a very timely dream.  I was pregnant ... I am 62 and post-menopause, so I knew something was up.  Someone else I knew was pregnant as well and had just birthed their creation.  Why wasn’t mine ready?  Where was mine.  I want it now!  I was completely wrapped up in trying to bring mine forth.  I was trying all sorts of concoctions, old wives tales, anything I could think of to force the birth.  But when I would look down at my belly, I could see that it was not nearly large enough.  I would look up and around to see if anyone else noticed, but bottom line, it wasn’t ready and no amount of forcing would make it arrive any sooner.

Gee, no big mystery as to what that was all about!  Gotta love our subconscious ...   

As for being very timely ... yesterday I was offered a free stay at a friends beachside condo while Dave is in DC for a library conference.  I have been wanting to do a mini KVK only beach retreat for years. It had just never worked out.  I had my bags all packed and a tote bag loaded with assorted notebooks and journals and my favorite crystals, all set to do some deep inner exploring in addition to walking on the beach and swimming in the ocean side pool.  Waking up from that dream I decided to put all my inner work plans on hold and leave things be ... you know, like normal people, like a real vacation.

So that’s what I’m doing right now ... sitting on a balcony overlooking a small lake, reading a fluffy novel after a morning of bike riding through the ocean hammock, followed by walking on the beach, swimming in the pool, more walking on the beach and more swimming.  AKA, relaxing.  What a concept!

 ocean hammock bike trail

ocean hammock bike trail

 crushed coquina shells instead of sand ... gorgeous!

crushed coquina shells instead of sand ... gorgeous!

 the oceanside pool

the oceanside pool

 Cinnamon Beach

Cinnamon Beach

You see, it’s not yet time.  All that worrying about my motivation being m.i.a. was not necessary... not sure if worrying is ever productive.  But before leaving I ordered an assortment of metal clay, ferrous sulphate to get my indigo vat going again, a mordant so I can eco-dye cellulose fibers and carrier oil for new fragrances.  So when it IS time, I’ll be ready to dive in!   

This will be me feeling immense gratitude and just chillin’ at the beach! 

TTFN...